Draconic Shennanigans Episode 11

Chapter 11: Journeys in the Dark

Kaelin fished the locket out of her collar. It was definitely knocking in her grasp. She looked round to double check that she was well sheltered by the flying buttresses of the cathedral and then flicked the locket's catch open.

Charlotte's face peered out of the locket at her and then visibly relaxed.

"Well I don't think we have to worry about testing the magic link continually," she reported, "I've detected no issues on this side of the canvas and the others are reporting no ill affects at the Wizard's Tower. So far we've been able to shift to and from the locket's portal without damage."

"Well that is good news," Kaelin said, raising an eyebrow. If all the news had been good then why had Charlotte been looking so wound up when she had opened the locket?

"Where are you?" Charlotte asked with an intensity that was unusual in a noble.

"South side of the cathedral of Lotton," Kaelin reported, glancing round the edge of the buttress to her right. A squad of guard were jogging across the square, heading towards the noble quarter of town. Charlotte frowned.

"This makes no sense," she admitted.

"That I'm in a city? Or that I'm near a holy building and I haven't burst into flames?" Kaelin's tone was wry.

"No, not that," Charlotte was impatient, "Don't ask me how it just worked but the reason I came back to the locket after speaking to the others back at the Tower is that for a moment there I could have sworn that you were close to my cousin."

Kaelin felt her mouth go dry.

"You are sure of that?" she managed to work up the saliva to be able to speak normally.

"Absolutely," Charlotte said, "I don't know who you were walking past but I felt that you were close to my cousin."

"Not walking by," Kaelin admitted, "Flying over."

"I beg your pardon?" Charlotte demanded.

"No time to explain," Kaelin cut her off, snapping the locket shut as another squad of Guard swung out of an alleyway near her and jogged towards the rich quarter. The moment they were gone, Kaelin dashed across the cobble stones to the bottom of the building nearest the cathedral. Within seconds she was back up on top of the roof tiles. Instantly she froze. Beneath her she heard the sleepy mumbles of a family in the attic just below the slates. Someone mumbled in their sleep, smacked their lips, rolled over and then added their snores to the others around them. Kaelin relaxed and breathed deep getting a feel for the night around her. Summoning skills she'd thought she'd dumped in the woods of her childhood, she ghosted up to the apex of the roof and gazed out on to the slate jungle that was the poor quarter. Within moments she had chosen her route and was moving, running cat footed over the roofs. Well, the mountain lion was one of the few creatures that could best a wolf after all. She grinned at the thought and hoped her grandsire was turning in his grave and if he wasn't in his grave, then she hoped she'd just given him belly ache.

*

Ulrich rode his lizard up on to the water front and looked round at the bright lights of the taverns and breathed deep of the pungent bouquet of the area. It was still odd to look at a scene that could have been the water front of any big port city but not detect any salt tang on the breeze. Ulrich found himself grinning any way. Right now, life was good. He had a mount fit for a king, he'd gained more friends among the little people and he was confident that the others were no were near here. Turning his lizard's head north, he rode along the promenade towards his waiting ship, smiling and nodding at the sullen looks he was getting. Oh there was belligerence on the breeze and if he'd been on foot he would not have been nearly so confident as he was now but riding something so exotic and having that blue eyed drake pad along behind as body guard did wonders for keeping the cut throats and thugs at bay. Granted some of the scowls he received could have been from fear but he wasn't about to stay and chat. Besides most of the darkest looks were coming from the knots of sailors left at the end of the warfs to discourage meddling in the ships. As much as keeping stow a-ways out of the holds might be a very necessary job it did not endear the world to a man when he could see and hear the delights of food, drink and pleasurable company not far away but completely out of his reach. A man with that resentment in his heart is likely to look for any way to work it out and beating, how did Dippler word it? Beating a draw handle senseless was likely a way that had many things to advertise itself to these leave denied men. Therefore Ulrich with his mount and scaly body guard was not playing the game.

The other set of dark looks were coming from the doormen of the various 'establishments' along the water front. Granted their looks were more the flat unfriendliness with which they greeted the whole world and the wish to convey to him that his patronage would not be welcome with such company as he kept. Beyond that they seemed to consider him as above their pay grade to deal with. Ulrich smiled at them, touched his forehead and clapped his heels to the flanks of his lizard. Its claws rasped as it scuttled up the dock side.

*

Kaelin paused on the roof titles and breathed deep again. She'd had to swing fairly far south to find a gap she could leap to make it on to the roofs of the warehouse district but she had managed it and now she had a fairly straight run up to the ship. For a moment she considered descending and running it on the street but then her ears detected the howling. It was out to the west, beyond the city limits, she was sure of that but she could still hear the faint sound of the pack calling its own to regroup. She started to shiver but then suppressed it. Well if that was to come, that was to come but she'd be ready for it this time, one way or another she be ready for it. She had her own pack now and she needed to catch up with them. After all, if this was going to be her pack then it was up to her to provide one of the alphas.

She breathed deep again and picked up a scent on the breeze. Turning her face north she started jogging over the tiles, able to disregard some of her earlier caution as she highly doubted there would be anyone to disturb in these buildings and even if there was, it would do the night watchmen good to have something to catch their interest and keep them awake.

*

Up in the loft space of the cathedral Thorian looked round. There were a lot of expensive looking chairs here and a lot of books. Rich people's place he decided and decided that he was also not going to touch the chairs. Chairs had a habit of breaking round him and he didn't want any more trouble than he already had in his life. The books however, the books could be... useful. He picked two up. They were a good size to fit into the hand but they were thick. He glanced over at Jeremiah who was flicking through one of them. The paper looked to be almost tissue thin but Thorian guessed that so many pages of it added up because they were good and heavy within his grasp. He gave Jeremiah a sharp jab with an elbow and then jerked his head at the stairs that lead even further down. Jeremiah huffed but didn't say anything, moving as silently as he could behind the big orc crossbreed.

Thorian lead the way down the spiral staircase, listening intently. Behind him Jeremiah stumbled on the stone steps and bit off a curse word.

"Hello?" a voice called. Thorian heard footsteps pace across the stone floor again. Shooting a glare at Jeremiah to make the fat man stay put, Thorian eased himself down the spiral staircase, hefting a book in his hand. Staying just round the curve of the stairs he waited, listening to the footsteps coming close to the entrance. The footsteps stopped; Thorian hefted one of the books high, muscles tense. The footsteps turned and walked back up the church. Thorian released a long slow breath of relief. He'd never met the young man with the lamp but with what he'd seen of his argument with the old guy Thorian liked him already and he knew he would have felt bad about knocking him on the head, even if it was only with a book. Thorian turned his head and frowned at Jeremiah as the priest came waddling down the steps without being told the coast was clear.

Turning back to the entrance Thorian eased his head out for a look. The entrance to the steps was in the back of a pillar so it faced the back wall of the cathedral. Thorian eased round the pillar and looked up the church. He could see no one in the long straight space of the nave, though a shift of the shadows did lead him to believe that the young man with the lamp was in one of the side spaces.

"He's in the north transept," Jeremiah hissed, leaning out from the pillar, ready to duck back out of sight.

Thorian pushed his chin out and nodded as he digested the fancy word, then he turned and walked towards the door. Though his feet were quiet, he didn't walk with an excess of caution.

"What are you doing?" Jeremiah looked like he was going to have a heart attack on the spot as he shuffled after Thorian, glancing round the church with the wide eyes of one who expects the mob with the extra pitch forks option to jump out on him at any moment.

"I'm leaving the church," Thorian murmured, "I came in to see the place, now I'm leaving. There's naught wrong with that so they won't be upset."

"Not upset?" Jeremiah gasped.

"Of course not," Thorian grinned, "Perhaps you should have more faith." Jeremiah gaped as he realized that Thorian had made a successful dig at him. Thorian grinned back, reached for the door handle and then remembered that both his hands were full of books. He turned, walked back into the church, Jeremiah looking like he was going to faint on the spot, laid the books down on a pew, walked back to the doors, opened them and stepped outside. He stepped out on to the little plaza area on the top of the cathedral steps and breathed deep of the night air. Behind him Jeremiah caught the door, slipped through and eased the door shut so that it made the smallest sounding thud, barely enough to disturb the air inside the cathedral.

"Right," Thorian said, "Back to the ship." Without hesitating he turned and set off towards the docks, his long legs eating up the distance and making Jeremiah scamper to keep up.

"Do we have to go so fast?" Jeremiah protested, panting as he tried to keep within Thorian's shadow.

"Lots of unfriendly faces round here," Thorian stated, "Maybe if Calypso was still with us, we wouldn't have to go so fast to keep out of trouble." Jeremiah rolled his eyes. Really the dumb crossbreed was being entirely too unreasonable about the whole pet situation.

*

Ulrich rode up the wharf towards the Armored Dragon with a smile on his face. The Captain sat on his barrel as if he hadn't left, only the pile of shavings round his feet and the nearly complete wooden bird in his grip denoting the amount of time that had passed. The Captain looked round at the sound of footsteps and raised his great curly eyebrows at the sight that greeted him.

"It appears that you have had some adventures, mon amei," he exclaimed, "Am I a-right in believing you met up with my old friend?"

"That we did," Ulrich smiled as he drew the lizard to a stop, "He sends his regards but he couldn't come himself. He has some rather pressing problems at home, so to speak, but he understands the need to get rid of this Kraken in the lake and has sent us loaded down with equipment for the job." He patted the boxes that contained the lanterns where they hung in his saddle bags.

The Captain raised his eyebrows again.

"So it is a Kraken in our little lake?" he observed, "I did suspect that it was so but I didn't want to believe such an unnatural thing was possible. Still if the Master Smith says that it is so I would not be the one to gainsay him. Thinking on such matters, where are your companions? Or was the trouble my old friend has at home really that lethal?" The tension built round his eyes as he obviously jumped to the wrong conclusion.

"No, no," Ulrich laughed, waving a reassuring hand, "We just became separated on our way back into the city. Of course I managed to choose the most efficient route so I'm back first. I'm sure the others will be along in good time. What say you to sharing..."

"A drink?" Kaelin's voice interrupted as she rappelled down a rope, jerking to a stop, upside down, just behind Ulrich's shoulder, "I'd love one. It is thirsty work, all this waiting around for you to turn up. I'd nearly dozed off up there in the crow's nest while you took your time."

"Well, is hardly surprising that I was a little behind you," Ulrich said nonchalantly, trying to disguise just how hard his heart had slammed up against its containing ribs at the sound of her voice, "After all I have been carrying you all on my back for the last few days, I am beginning to feel a little tired."

"And just who was it who fought those spiders so hard that he passed out afterwards?" Kaelin asked, flipping herself up the right way and plucking something off of Ulrich's shoulder, "Let's see, chair lint, instrument dust and oh yes, cake crumbs. Sorry and all that but I don't see a trace of forest floor mud in all of that lot."

"Some of us bath on a regular basis and remember to laundry our clothes," Ulrich observed.

The Captain laughed before they could argue any further.

"Well it seems that your trials are forging a strong bound between you," he laid a brown hand on a shoulder of each of them, "Only true friends can argue so much and still be friends but let us not test the bound so hard just yet. What say you to settling your little critters in the hold and then sharing of a drink while you tell me all about your adventures in the Dead Swamp? I take it that what you feared so very much did not happen while your were visiting my old friend?" The last was addressed to Kaelin directly and she shrugged.

"That remains to be see," she replied, "But I am now more prepared for it than I was." She patted Haggis with a found hand.

"Well that is a most unusual instrument than I have seen in many a day," the Captain observed as he turned towards the gang plank.

"You wait until you hear it," Ulrich's tone was wry.

"Hello mister green dragon , are your eyes open tonight?" Kaelin asked, butchering the common saying about jealousy being a green eyed dragon. The Captain laughed again and then a high, haunting cry echoed across the lake, part whistle, part trumpet call, the weird dissonance immediately catching the attention. The Captain turned with a smile as a truly enormous bird drifted into view through the night gloom. Its wings seemed to fill the entire sky with a white glow. The Captain stepped back off the gang plank as it swooped down towards the end of the jetty. Then its wings were flipping in an odd backwards stroke as its huge webbed feet lowered and it dropped the last foot through the air to plop on to the planks with a less graceful landing than many birds Kaelin had seen. Somehow that didn't matter, the breath stolen by the spectacle of its wings that seemed to stretch on for ever, then slowly, turn by turn, fold by fold those stunning wings pleated down and down again, finally flipping flat to its back. With that whistling cry, it fluttered its tail and padded forward, stepping up to the Captain. It stretched its neck up, and not far, to preen at the Captain's beard, a cackling noise rising from it as the Captain gently nibbed his fingers through the bird's feathers at the back of its head.

"My friends," he said, once he and the bird had finished greeting one another, "May I introduce Risk? He has been my companion as we sailed many a day over deep water and he has save my life and my ship many a time."

Risk turned deep, dark eyes on Kaelin and she felt that she could fall forever into those pools of shadow but it was not a scary feeling. There was a wisdom and a strength in this bird, the air that it had seen more than most would see in their entire lives and he accepted Kaelin just as she was, without doubt or reservation. She inclined her head to him.

"A truly magnificent animal," Ulrich complimented but Risk's eyes told him that the bird knew that Ulrich wasn't being fully honest and that unnerved him even more. Whether his mount picked up on a shift in Ulrich's weight or it had its own feeling about the creature in front of it, the lizard flicked out its tongue in a long slow.... the tongue whipped back into the lizard's mouth as Risk's beak clacked shut a hair breath from having it off. Bird and lizard stared at each other a moment longer and then the lizard took a measured pace back. Ulrich stared at the back of his mount's head but the Captain laughed again.

"You will find that Risk is also a good judge of character," he observed, "And he knows more of what you intend than you will give him credit for. I think it has not been the first time he has helped me nip a mutiny in the bud before the rot could even begin to think of spreading."

"Probably a good thing that most sailors think it is ill fate to harm such a bird then," Ulrich observed as Risk turned and lead the way up the gangplank, the Captain following his companion.

"I did not expect a landbound man to know that respect," the Captain gave Ulrich a surprised glance. "I can see that a sailing with the King's Special is likely to be many things but it shall not be boring."

"Always glad to oblige," Ulrich replied with a cocky grin as he guided his lizard on to the gang plank behind Kaelin, the drake padding on behind him.

The Captain laughed again and then called to his crew.

"Lads, rearrange the cargo, we have some live ones to shift."

*

 Much to Jeremiah's surprise they did make it to the docks without any incidences of an unpleasant nature, which was strange considering there were definitely fewer Guardsmen on patrol than he'd expected. Still the waterfront toughs they had passed seemed to be more concerned with staying close to the doors of the warehouses they were guarding and most of the rest of the crowd of sailors on shore leave seemed to be crammed into the taverns.

"You see," Thorian breathed deep and smiled, "I told you we had nothing to worry about if we walked fast enough."

Jeremiah gritted his teeth and gripped the stitch in his side. He was going to make someone pay for this night's indignities. He didn't know who yet but someone was going to pay for tonight. Thorian turned and strode off up the water front to the north, forcing Jeremiah to straighten and scurry off after him with narrowed, angry eyes.

"Well bloody stinking Pits!" someone shouted, "It's the King's Special! I thought you people had all died, you crazy fools!" Thorian stopped and turned his head towards the voice. Standing at the end of a jetty was a sailor, fists on his waist, leaning forward as if he didn't believe what his eyes were telling him. Thorian frowned and scratched his head a moment and then the penny dropped.

"I know you!" Thorian beamed, "Yah told us 'bout the Armored Dragon. How's you doing?"

"Bored out of my head until I saw you," the sailor took the hand Thorian held out and shook it, "We all thought you'd either died or you'd packed up and left since the Dragon hadn't shifted from her berth."

"Nah," Thorian shook his head, "We're all still about, just had to go and fetch some stuff from the Dead Swamp for the trip."

"The Dead Swamp! You don't say!" the sailor seemed stunned, "You've been in that place? I thought anyone who went in there became some sort of puppet for the Wizard who lives in there!"

"Nah," Thorian shook his head again, "That was the old dud who was in there. Elisha is a good sport and the damned souls are alright once you get used to them."

"Elisha? Damned souls?" the sailor shook his head, frowning and yet wide eyed at the same time.

"Yeah, my friend Elisha," Thorian grinned, "He's a good old cove and he's offered my people a home! Says he wants our loyal-tee beside him and I like Crowface, his dep-u-tee."

"Crowface is?" the sailor asked.

"Head of the damned souls," Thorian grinned, "He's strong and brave and true. He wants me there too. Its nice to have a home to go back to."

"Yeash," the sailor shook his head in admiration, "You must be one tough cove, me hearty, if you can walk into the den of monsters and call it home."

"I guess it depends you what you call a monster," Jeremiah puffed, "I would guess that goblins probably scare their children to bed with tales of the nasty human mens who will come and chop them up if they don't do as they are told."

The sailor stared and then laughed.

"Well you've been good to break up the evening my hearties," he leaned on a barrel, "It was getting quite boring round here after all the excitement of earlier."

"Why aren't you off with your friends?" Thorian asked.

"Drew the short straw to guard the ship," the sailor turned his head and spat chewing tobacco into the harbor, "More than my life's worth to wander off from my post but there are times when I wish a bunch of werewolves would come down here and kick over the traces. It would be something to liven up the evening." 

"Werewolves?" Jeremiah asked, with a semblance of his usual smile, "Is that what the fuss you mentioned earlier was all about?"

"Yeah," the sailor grinned, "Apparently a gang of them gatecrashed some big party the knobs were having up in one of their fancy palaces. Don't know whether any of them were bit but it will be fun to see if they admit it."

"I suppose that they will have to, what with the risks the victims will pose come the next full moon," Jeremiah smiled oily, "After all, it is a matter of public safety..."

"Yeah right!" the sailor interrupted, "You ever see a knob risk his own hide? Oh no, if they'd attacked in the rookeries then the knobs would have all been for burning them out with fire, fire and worse. Cause its some of their own, they'll keep it quiet and the bitten will be shuffled off to some big house in the country were they'll be kept locked up until they die. No stain on the family honor that way. Ha, honor. Yeah right." He spat again into the harbor.

"Aren't you worried about being bitten yourself if the hairy burgers turn up here?" Thorian asked, a little bemused. How could someone be put off by his friends among the damned souls and yet not be afraid of werewolves?

"Have you ever heard of a werewolf sailor?" the sailor grinned, "Nah, I don't think they will turn up here. They don't seem to like the taste of sailors."

"Perhaps they are afraid of getting wet," Jeremiah observed with a smile. The sailor stared for a moment and then guffawed so loud that some of the more sober ones outside the alehouses turned their heads to stare.

"That's brilliant that is," he slapped Jeremiah on the back so hard the priest stumbled, "I never thought of it but dogs are always afraid of having a bath!"

"Go on!" someone called from the crowd outside the nearest alehouse, "What's the joke?"

"My friend here just suggested that if those werewolves coming down here we should just yeet them all into the harbor and see how they'd like to have a bath!" the sailor called back. After a moment a ragged cheer grew from the crowd, swelled into a roar and then dissolved into ever more lively partying.

"Well I'd love to hang around and add to the evening's fun," Jeremiah's smile had become a little fixed, "But we really have to crack on and make it to our ship. After all, we were supposed to be racing the others there and I think we have given them enough of a head start."

"The others?" the sailor asked, "Did the fancy looking fellow picked up a giant lizard on your travels recently? Has he taken to riding the darn thing about?"

"Yeah, that's Ulrich," Thorian grinned.

"I think you lost your race then," the sailor grimaced in sympathy, "The guy who's watch I took over said he'd seen a toff riding a big aft lizard up the water front like he owned the place. I thought the description sounded like your friend but I didn't believe it."

"Ah rats," Thorian exclaimed.

"Oh well, my green friend," Jeremiah laid a consoling hand on Thorian's arm, "These things are sent to try us."

"Aye," Thorian looked down on his hand with a flat expression in his eyes, "And you try laying a finger on me again, I'll break yah wrist." Jeremiah withdrew his hand hastily.

"I'd love to stay and chat," Thorian turned back to the sailor, "But it seems that we have to get along."

"Time and tide wait for no one, my friend," the sailor shrugged, "When you get back from giving that thing in the lake a right good kicking we'll have to go for a drink while you tell me the yarn."

"I'd love to tell the tale but no drinking," Thorian said empathically.

"Oh why?" the sailor asked, cocking his head sideways.

"I don't do well with drink," Thorian shook his head, "The last time I drank something that someone else handed me I woke up with an invisible, giant space dragon stomping on mah head. I'm not drinking anything else someone hands me ever again."

"We'll have to try the Battered Bugle then," the sailor grinned, "The barman there has this stuff he makes out of ginger root and these tiny little peppers that will take the lining off yah throat and burn yah tongue off at the roots but it sobers a man up like nothing else. I've known him serve it to sea dogs who were as drunk as lords and they came out of there stone cold sober. Some of the guys go there without needing any fire water in their veins first. They take it as a challenge to see who can drink the most before their bellies are full of bonfires but it doesn't put yah head on the anvil the following day. Yah can drink that stuff until you think you are going to spit fire like a dragon and be as sober as a judge the following day."

"Now that sounds cool," Thorian grinned, "That I'd like to try."

"We'll drink the place dry when we get back," the sailor promised with a grin as they turned away to carry on down the water front.

Ulrich had just come back up on deck when he spied Jeremiah and Thorian coming up the water front. He quickly ducked down behind the rigging, where he could peak through one of the big bull's eye of the rigging and see the bottom of the gangplank. As he watched the pair make their way out on to the warf he grinned with a sudden idea.

Thorian had been distracted by the sight of a truly enormous bird sitting on the rail of the poop deck, watching them with dark, interested eyes and as such he had stopped walking for a moment.

"That is not something you see every day of the week," Thorian said quietly. Jeremiah completely ignored the comment and pushed passed to the bottom of the gangplank. He was about to put his foot on it when a voice rang out from the ship.

"Oi, what do you think you are doing? Trying to board this ship without permission! We ought to keelhaul you were you stand for trying it!"

On board ship, Kaelin frowned as she looked round at where Ulrich was kneeling but he waved a hand at her to keep down. She rolled her eyes but did as asked.

"I am most incredibly sorry," Jeremiah bowed slightly to the ship, eyes scanning along the railing, trying to spot his challenger, "Forgive my rudeness, we merely wished to join our friends on board."

"And who said you have any friends on board this ship," the voice answered back, "Now be off with you."

Jeremiah frowned. He couldn't quite place the accent or the voice, it almost sounded like someone was throwing his voice. Thorian had stopped again some paces behind Jeremiah and now he was watching the show with increasing glee. The fat man hadn't seemed to recognize the voice of their friend and now, well now...

"That is most strange," Jeremiah frowned, "We were assured that our friends had already reached our ship and boarded."

"Who said that?" the voice demanded, "How would I know one of your friends if they came up to me and spat in my face? How would anyone else know it was one of your friends, if you have any of those that is?"

Thorian  folded his arms and slowly pushed a knuckle into his mouth to stop himself from exploding with laughter as Jeremiah fumbled and bumbled through the conversation, still desperately scanning the gunwale, trying to see who it was who was being so obtuse.

"I am fairly sure that you would recognize our friends," Jeremiah's smile had become the fixed grimace that meant his ability to oil himself through any social situation was beginning to fail, "One of them is a rather uptight young woman who threatens to break all your fingers with a look if you lay your hands on her. The other is a rather inflated young man who fancies himself as a lord and ha taken to riding an over sized lizard that he did nothing to earn."

"He's not entirely wrong with that description you know," Kaelin whispered to Ulrich, having accepted Jeremiah's description of herself as a compliment.

"Who's side are you on?" Ulrich demanded in a hiss.

"Who said I'd join either side?" Kaelin asked, "I'm just here for the fun."

"Look if I meet anyone of that description I'll let you know," Ulrich called out load, "Now push off and try and find some friends else were."

"Look," Jeremiah snapped, "Is this ship The Armored Dragon or isn't it?"

"No, this here ship is not the Armored Dragon so push off!" the reply came back.

Jeremiah drew himself up and inflated. Kaelin could almost swear she heard his ribs creak, then he turned on his heel and stalked up the jetty to the bow of the ship and had a long look at the figure head. He stomped back down the boards so hard that they seemed to rattle against their pegs.

"I suggest, friend," he ground out the last word like an insult, "That you learn to tell lies that aren't so easy to disprove because if that figure head isn't an armored dragon then one of us is the Soaring Arman."

"Ah but you said you where looking for The Armored Dragon," Ulrich somehow managed to keep his smile out of his voice as he replied but lordy it was difficult when even Kaelin was fighting to keep a straight face. Thorian looked just about ready to burst. "This ship is just Armor Dragon, not The Armored Dragon. The ship you are looking for is about two berths south. Just run along and stop being a bother, now there's a good chap."

Jeremiah narrowed his eyes. The voice might be different but that last phrase... someone's caricature was slipping. Very stiffly he turned and made his way back down the jetty. After a moment Thorian managed to follow him but behind Jeremiah's back he was wiping tears of laughter from his eyes. He winced and put a hand to his side. He just might have snapped a rib with the effort to not laugh out loud.

Jeremiah strode down the water front for a couple of berths and then approached the sailors standing guard at the end of the wharfs.

"Good evening my good sirs," Jeremiah bowed slightly from the waist, making Hat clatter for a moment, "I was wondering if you could help me."

"Depends," one of the sailors managed to drag his eyes away from the oversized moth riding on Jeremiah's miter.

"I'm looking for The Armored Dragon as I need to charter her for a journey and I was wondering if you'd be able to point me in the right direction to her," Jeremiah oiled. The sailor looked at him as if he was dumb.

"Yah just came from her berth," he said, "You got trouble with yah eyes or something?"

"No, I see quite well," Jeremiah's smile became a fixed grimace, "But tell me, is there another Armored Dragon in these parts?"

"Nah, there's only one Armored Dragon in these parts or any other," the sailor stated, "And you must be on some right crazy trip if you want to charter her to go out on the lake right now. Haven't you heard about what is going on out there?"

"Oh rest assured that I have heard in detail what is going on out on the lake at the moment," Jeremiah's smile became a little less fixed as the other sailors stared at him with awe, "Which is precisely why I need to charter the Armored Dragon to take me out on the lake. Now would you confirm where I might find her?"

"Last berth that way," the sailor pointed, something like fear in his eyes.

"So glad to speak with you," Jeremiah's smile was close to genuine as he lifted his hand in the symbol of blessing over the gathered sailors. Now that was gratifying. What was not gratifying was turning round and seeing Thorian's smirking face behind him. The brainless dolt had been in on the joke! Jeremiah's wrath swelled as he stalked up the water front. Someone was going to hurt for this nights humiliations.

"Uh oh," Ulrich observed from where he was keeping an eye on the wharf's end, "Here comes trouble."

"Just how bad?" Kaelin inquired without turning from where she was paring her nails with a sharp knife under the light of a lantern.

"Let's put it this way," Ulrich observed as he stood and straightened his clothes, "I think the only way this could become any worse is if Hartseer turns up unannounced."

"Your fault," Kaelin observed, blowing on her nails.

Jeremiah, well he probably thought that he billowed but it was more a case of he ballooned up the jetty to the base of the gang plank.

"Permission to come abroad?" he put every ounce of the voice that used to be able to project itself clean down the nave of the Abbey behind the shout. Kaelin winced and wiggled a finger in her ear. They had probably heard that back at the Inn of the Pointy Hat, if not in the capital itself.

"Permission granted," Ulrich stepped up to the railing near the prow, all smiles, "What kept you?"

Jeremiah glared at him with narrowed eyes as he stamped on to the gang plank. It flexed most alarmingly and Jeremiah stumbled to a stop. He froze with his arms out spread until it stopped its undulations. With a deep and careful breath he straightened and stepped slowly up the gang plank.

"One of the sailors seems to enjoy playing pathetic jokes on prospective passengers," he stated as he stepped out on to the deck.

"Oh, how inconsiderate of your position," Ulrich observed. Kaelin snorted and cleared her throat. Jeremiah looked at her and then looked at Ulrich again, ignoring the noise of Thorian making his way on to the deck.

"You wouldn't happen know who it was who was trying to deny me my passage on this ship?" Jeremiah asked Ulrich politely.

"Sorry old boy, I was down below, helping to settle my mount and your drake in the cargo hold," Ulrich shook his head, "Neither of them seemed that happy with being shut up down there, though I have to see my lizard was more obedient about the whole thing. Could have done with you here sooner."

"Indeed," Jeremiah's eyes were narrowed to slits as he watched Ulrich's posturing, mind busy with lining up speech patterns and mannerisms. Before it could become any more tense, the Captain stepped out on board deck.

"Well mon amei," he stepped forward with a smile to shake Jeremiah's hand, "We were beginning to wonder if you had decided that it would be safer to walk to our destination. What delayed you so very long?"

"One of your sailors has a rather perverse sense of humor," Jeremiah said coldly, "They appear to enjoy playing tricks on prospective passengers."

The Captain laughed and shook his head.

"Oh my apologies mon amei," he smiled, "My crew has become some what unruly with all this enforced sitting about in port. I am surprised that there haven't been worse problems than I have had already. I am sure that once we are back out on the deep water they will settle down and stop all of these silly tricks. If nothing else I will make sure that they are kept too busy with their duties to be a bothering you."

"As long as that is true," Jeremiah huffed.

"It will be," the Captain smiled, "Though it is a good thing that we are not slaves to time and tide on this fair lake as it seems that many of my crew will be feeling more than a little delicate at sunrise tomorrow."

"Why would that be?" Thorian asked.

"What is there for a man to do in port if he has not the brains to keep himself busy with a little job?" the Captain smiled and held up the carving of the bird he had apparently been working on since they first met him. Kaelin looked from it to where Risk sat on the gunwale of the poop deck. The big bird saw her looking and opened his beck in a haunting cry in answer to her regard.

"I am afraid that most of my crew will have heads the size of whales tomorrow morning and will not be up to working as hard as they should do," the Captain admitted.

"Won't that make them all fall over, if their heads have grown that big?" Thorian asked. The Captain frowned at him and then laughed again.

"Their heads will still be the same size as always but they will feel like they have grown enormous on the ends of their necks," he explained.

Thorian thought about it.

"Oh," he said at last, "It will be like me this morning when I had that giant invisible space dragon stomping on my head. That makes sense. Why do people drink like that, it just makes you hurt?"

"Perhaps because they do not have the brains to consider that there may be a better way of spending their time," the Captain answered, "Or perhaps they think that the fun they have out weighs the pain they later receive. Or perhaps because one drink changes them from people who don't drink a lot into people who do. Who can fathom the minds of a drunk?"

"I sure can't," Thorian agreed.

"So saying," the Captain observed, "If you do not have a berth in the town, would you like to sleep on board ship? If nothing else we will be ready then once my bosun has managed to track down all of my crew and filled up any gaps that have opened up."

"Sure, why not," Kaelin shrugged, one ear twitching as she tried to double check that the howling had stopped. There further away she was from the center of the town the better. She dug for a moment in her memory and couldn't come up with one instance where her grandfather had mentioned anything to do will sailing or boats. That had always meant he had brushed off that detail of the world as not fitting with 'the Wild'. Always good as far as she was concerned.

"I am afraid that the cabins are double berthed so you will have to decide whom is sharing with who," the Captain admitted, "I would suggest that we let the lady choose to avoid future arguments."

Kaelin pursed her mouth for a moment and then pointed.

"Thorian," she stated, " 'Cause he's the one least likely to try anything funny."

"Oh, don't you like my jokes?" Thorian pouted.

"That wasn't the sort of funny business I was talking about," Kaelin observed.

"I think it is a fantastic idea," Jeremiah smiled oily but there was the flicker of something that promised charring in his eyes. Ulrich immediately sidled up to Thorian.

"Thorian old pal, I was the one that helped you out when Calypso left us," he wasn't as good at oiling as Jeremiah was.

"Yeah? You gave me that stuff that made my head hurt so badly this morning," Thorian folded his arms.

"Well, I wasn't to know it would take you that badly," Ulrich spread his hands, "I was just trying to help and I'm not the one who left you carrying all the boxes."

"That's true," Thorian noted and then he scowled, "Wait a minute? Are you trying to get me to swap places with you?"

"I do believe that is his intentions," Jeremiah smiled, "I have to admit that I didn't expect our gallant noble man to be so under handed as to..."

"Then you have no idea about what being a noble is about!" Ulrich snapped, "It is all underhanded, backstabbing scheming..."

"So you were trying to get me to swap with you!" Thorian scowled even darker, his knuckles cracking ominously.

"Just one more thing to think about, Thorian," Kaelin laid a calming hand on his arm, "Have I ever actually been mean to you?"

"No, no you haven't," Thorian relaxed as he thought about it, "And you did help me out when it all went weird at the haddey." He shot a look at Jeremiah.

"But..." Ulrich protested.

"My good friend," the Captain interrupted, "It is known wisdom in my homeland that one should not gainsay a lady's wishes."

"But..." Ulrich started again.

"The lady has spoken and you would find it best if you do not counter her wishes," the Captain stated, "Now I will show you to your quarters."

"But..." Ulrich tried for a third time but everyone was turning away from him.

"I'm not a lady," Kaelin muttered as she fell in at Thorian's shoulder.

"My dear, you are much more of a lady than many I have seen who bare more exulted titles," Jeremiah smiled and bowed slightly to her. 

"And your opinion matters to who?" Kaelin was blunt as always.

"Here we are," the Captain swung open the doors to the cabins below the Captain's cabin in the stern of the ship, "I hope that you will have a restful night."

"I know I will," Jeremiah grinned at Ulrich. Ulrich swallowed and closed his eyes. It seemed he'd got himself into the trouble that his father had always said he'd get himself into.

As it is he woke up the next morning without any pain or with any weird additions to his personage. He rolled over in the bunk to double check and then sat bolt upright. It appeared that a bunch of irate colonialists had held a tea party in his bed! Heaps and mounds of tea leaves lay piled around him in the bed sheets... and they were inside his shirt! With a cry he leapt out of bed, desperately trying to shake the scratching, itching particulars from his person. Then he thought about where all this tea had come from. He dived across the cabin to where his saddle rested against the wall, hands fumbling over the bags tied to it. He carefully pulled out the tea caddie and breathed with relief. No harm apparently done and when he flicked open the lid it was still as full of tea as it ever had been, then a particularly stubborn leaf gouged him in the crock of his elbow. With a grunted curse he put the tea caddie down, pulled off his shirt and turned it inside out, shaking it all the time while he did so.

Muttering words that would have definitely earned him a strapping from the butler at his father's instructions, he finally managed to be fairly sure that his clothes where free of small and annoying bits of tea. He sat down on the edge of the bunk and pulled one of his boots towards him. He stopped in the middle of lifting his foot, looked inside it and with a sigh, tipped it up on end, watching the stream of shortbread crumbs tumble out on to the floor in a little heap.

About an hour later, once he was finally and completely sure that all small, scratchy and annoying food particles had been removed from his clothes and that none of the items he had been given at the Wizard's Tower had been damaged, Ulrich stepped out on deck. He breathed in deep and then snapped his head round a very recognizable but unusual scent.

"Good morning," Jeremiah took a sip from the steaming cup he held, "I hope you slept well. I know I did."

"Where did you...?" Ulrich began.

"Oh I do apologize," Jeremiah smiled, "I accidentally knocked over some of your stuff this morning while I was getting dressed and this very interesting substance spilled out from a tin you seem to be carrying. I did my best to tidy it all up but I could help taking just a pinch to try."

"It could have been poison you know," Ulrich managed to be level, "It would have been safer and more polite if you had asked before helping yourself."

"My dear Ulrich," Jeremiah beamed, "Are you admitting to transporting highly dangerous and prohibited substances? I dare say our noble King's Sword would be most interested to hear about this." His look said that he would thoroughly enjoy getting Ulrich neck deep in a huge amount of bird guano with Hartseer and it would be all the better if it was on false pretenses.

"I admit to nothing of the sort," Ulrich stated, "I merely pointed out that it could have been a poison when you take something without the owners permission. I would hardly have thought that I needed to lecture a man of the cloth about polite manners."

"Well you were sleeping so peacefully that I really didn't want to disturb you," Jeremiah's smile could have greased a dozen lamps, "You did have a tiring night after all, losing the race to Kaelin like you did. Consideration for another's distress is part of the compassion that, as a man of the cloth, I am supposed to embody."

"You could have remembered that before you let Calypso die for the second time," Ulrich realized that he wasn't winning any points here.

"I did ask you to make sure that Thorian didn't find any distressing evidence when I realized that I had over exerted my powers," Jeremiah replied, "I was considerate that we would need to break the news to Thorian in a more gentle manner than you allowed when you failed to make good on the promise to tidy away the mess."

There wasn't really an answer Ulrich could think of to that.

"I'm going to go and get breakfast," he muttered, striding off to the hold.

"Just bare in mind we are supposed to be sailing this morning," Jeremiah called after him, "You wouldn't want to miss the boat. After all, if you did, our dear Hartseer might think you were trying to jump on your parole and I hear he gets really rather snippitty about such things. One could almost say he gets a little sharp about it."

"I could live with that," Ulrich muttered as he opened the gate to his lizard's temporary pen. It flowed up on to the deck like it was more than glad to be out of the hold already and Ulrich barely had time to swing himself up on to it bare back style before it was heading to the gang plank. Even so he still saw, out of the corner of his eye, Jeremiah draw a line in the air with a finger tip as if he was chalking up the score.