Sound Bites

Alright, the Christmas rush is settling down, I've had a great time seeing all my friends, managed to do some sewing projects that I've been meaning to do since the beginning of the year on the days that I wanted something to do with my hands while I was socialising. (Tip for Autistics: finding a job you can do while sat down and talking to others has a soothing quality for the mind.)  As such, I have finally repaired some work trousers for mother that I was meant to back in February and emptied out some more of my cupboards (I am still trying to cut down on the amount of stuff I own to make room for husband/baby).

Now I suppose it is time to do the whole 'get back to work' thing and start looking at my career again (I also have four days in my diary that are going to need filling up so that is going to take some time).

To that end I am pleased to announce that thanks to the director of 'Wanderers of War' Michael Hill and the actress Hazel Wilson, the opening scenes of 'The Return of a Nagus' are going to be available as an audio file from Saturday the 9th of January 2016.  I will warn you that this is not the whole book, nor even the first whole chapter as that ran to over an hours recording, but it gives a flavour for how the story develops and introduces some of the main characters and their struggles.

I will be uploading it here, on my website, in both the normal post feeds and I'm hoping to produce a whole page dedicated to both it and future sound bites as and when the next book is published.  I also hope to upload it on Youtube, although I'm not sure how that is going to go as I have never uploaded anything to Youtube before and I am pretty much computer illiterate.  Wish me luck.

Thank you to all who have made this year the memorable start to my career as an author.

Making Progress

O.K. as the Christmas rush hurries up, as it always does, I've finally made some progress.  This has not been easy, as my lack of posts can reveal.  I've just been having a very hard time of it trying to come up with any time to work on my projects and the muse totally deserted when it comes to writing blog posts.  What I think a lot of casual bloggers don't understand is that for a writer or an artist blogging is one of the many ways we have to promote ourselves and our work.  However, this requires time, time which we can no longer spend on our work and therefore we have less to blog about and therefore it takes more time to come up with something to blog about.  It can be a source of serious creators block.  I, for one, very rarely suffer from tradition 'writers' block' any more, what I suffer from is the writers' block caused by not having enough time to work on my writing or indeed my art.  I'm beginning to understand why Leonardo De Vinci rarely managed to finish a project, sometimes you just have too many ideas and not enough time to work on them all.

However, I have managed to make some time to work on my artwork and 'The Sorcerer' is progressing well.  I will admit that the last couple of days I have concentrated more on the rock he is standing on instead of the village he is watching over because the village, being in the distance, is minuscule and I'm going to have to use my finest brush, the one normally reserved for painting the details of someones iris, to do the people.  That is not going to be easy and I felt in need of a break from the pressure.

I'm hoping to be able to do a blog post, or maybe a couple, detailing my work process in the future.  All I need to do is find the time to connect my camcorder, which also takes still shots, to my computer and work my way through all the programming details.  I will be the first to admit that I am not what you could call computer literate.  In fact, my abilities with computers can be summed up as 'you press this button and it is meant to do this'.  If the computer decides not to do 'this' I have to run for help.  That is one of the reasons I do not do on-line banking (the other reason being if everybody does on-line banking who is going to give jobs to all those people who currently sit behind the tills in the banks?).

Any way, speaking on the lack of time, I need to be going.  May all my loyal readers have a happy and health end to the year.

Success!

So things are looking up, despite the mix up with the dates.  You may remember in my last post that I said that I was going to be doing a pop up stall in Barclays on Tuesday the first of December.  Well I arrived all set to do said pop up stall only to find that someone else was already setting up.  A quick check in Barclay's diary revealed that I was actually booked for Tuesday the eighth of December.  Not a good thing as I lost a bus fair with no return for it.  Serious Autistic moment when I arrived home, thankfully I had the house to myself at the time so I could really howl about it and therefore feel better within a few minutes instead of taking hours.

Autism Tip: If you are in a private area with an Autistic person who is on the verge of going into meltdown, it is better to leave be and let them have it, or even encourage them to really go for a good wailer of a crying jag rather than trying to calm them down.  Trying to calm them when their brain is not ready for that can mean that they balance for the rest of the day on the edge of feeling out of step with the world, depressive, no good at what they do etc.  Letting them have their melt down good and proper there and then re-balances the brain chemicals and means that it is over within a short time.  Once they have had their 'little moment' they will be more willing to look at the situations with an open mind and a calmer demeanour.

As it is having the pop up stall delayed by a week turned out to be a good thing as I managed to sell six items (including one of my books) when I did hold it this week.  That is more than I have sold in the previous four months and to add to that success Leaves of Dreams in Watton has sold two of my prints on their first day!  That news particularly put me over the moon as I have struggled since I had them printed to sell my larger prints, now I've sold, through a third party two of them on one day.  Now that is what I call success!  And hopefully it marks the beginning in an up turn in the sales of my stuff.

If you would like to visit Leaves of Dreams and have a dig through not only my artwork but also that of other local artist, musicians and writers then the address is:

Leaves of Dreams

47 High Street

Watton

Norfolk

IP25 6AB

As ever you can also visit my shop page for the links to all my other outlets.

Here's to a happy and healthy Christmas and New Year for all my loyal readers.  If you don't celebrate anything at this time of year then may I wish you a happy and healthy end to the year.

Sales and Shops

Hopefully moving up in the world.

Not only am I doing another pop up stall in Barclays tomorrow, on Tuesday the 1st of December, so hopefully I'll be able to catch anyone who is still out there looking for the perfect Christmas present for a family member or a friend but I am also going to have shelf space in a shop.

Light Leaves Experience on Facebook have had so much interest that they are now opening a small shop in Watton, Norfolk, UK, as of December the 9th.

Leaves of Dreams is opening its doors at 10am on Thursday 9th and I'm going to have some wall space and maybe even a shelf or two to sell my stuff on.  This is fantastic as it means that I'm going to have a permanent outlet for my products, which will hopefully sell more than when I'm catching craft fairs as and when I can.

Leaves of Dreams is located at:

Leaves of Dreams

47 High Street

Watton

IP25 6AB

They can also be emailed at leavesofdreams.venture@gmail.com

Their doors are open to any creative in the Norfolk area and beyond, if you have non-damageable goods that can be posted to them.

Of course if you prefer to buy on line, all the links to my various goods are available on my Shop page.  And of course, if you are in the Dereham area tomorrow then you can always meet me in person at the Barclays bank opposite the Hollywood Cinema.

Art, Editing and the Tribes

Thought I'd do a general round up of how things are going.

Due to the fact that the infant distraction has only three months now before he arrives in our lives and has seriously started fidgeting to let me know this, the artwork has taken on something of an urgent note.  After all I can sit and edit with my editor while my hands are full of a little wiglet but I can't hold a paint brush with the same ability.  Oh for having four hands!  I think every mother in history has made that particular cry, particularly working mothers.

Either way, I am now trying my best to do as much of the artwork before the arrival date as I can.  This includes a Brain Froud inspired series of fairy oil pastels that I'm hoping to sell as the originals as I've done them on A2 and therefore they are too big to scan and JPEG.  I've managed to do two already and though I'm not totally happy with the second I'm going to keep it in with the rest.  In that way I find oil pastel work to be very refreshing.  As you cannot correct mistakes with oil pastels I do not go in for all the little details that normally signify my other work, instead concentrating on the broad outlines and basic shades.  As such, I can complete an A2 piece in about an hour on average, rather than several days if not months.  For me being able to slam down a piece of work so darn quickly gives an instant confidence boast, even if it hasn't come out quite right, and since it is so fast I find I'm not quite so emotionally involved with the piece.  In short, it is something of a holiday for me, even though I am still working.  It also puts to use the oil pastels that I've had sitting in my cupboard for goodness only knows how many years so they are not wasted space.  I'll probably continue to work on the A2 pieces until I run out of oil pastels.

On the editing side, it is slow going at the moment as the operation my editor was going to be going in for has been cancelled at the very last moment so she is still not in a very good way.  Hopefully, we'll be able to crack on with the second book very soon but it is going to depend.  It takes a while to reorganise everything after a disappointment like that and her condition does mean that at the moment her health has to be her first priority.  However, I do have a different editor working with me on 'Gloomlight' so hopefully that project will continue at a much faster pace.

Speaking of such, I am finally on to sorting out the thirteen tribes of the vampires for 'Gloomlight'.  O.K. fourteen if you count the Nostropho, which even the other vampires don't.  The other vampires look down on these creatures as the distasteful dog in the house, or maybe more like how Victorians looked down on the people in the 'freak shows'.  The sort of 'you know you are distantly related but only a real social imbecile actually states it' way of looking down on some one without quite tilting your head back to show you are looking down your nose at them.  The vampires like to feel superior to everyone and everything around them and the Nostropho seriously let the side down, hence why the other vampires have no compunctions about putting down their animalistic brethren down when they find a hive.  That and it is a good excuse to let their hair down and let the beast side of their natures out.  Though they consider themselves superior to humans, the vampires have learnt in their long history of persecution and know that if they give the humans too much of an excuse then the stakes and pitchforks are going to come out so they keep the fangs in check and limit they violence.  Finding a Nostropho hive is an opportunity to let go of all restraints and kill for the sheer pleasure of killing.  That and Nostropho are dangerous creatures to tackle, even for a vampire, so there is the element of risk that a vampire simply doesn't get in one on one combat with a human, which makes it all the more fun of course.

Hopefully I'll have some state lines to publish soon.

Gloomlight

Since I announced it earlier, I've decided to get a brief over view of my Savage Worlds RPG project.

'Gloomlight' is set starting in 2150 and makes the assumption that trade deals like TTIP go through in 2010, giving corporations the power to throw every single regulation that harms their profit out of the window.  About one hundred and fifty years later the smog cloud is global and things that fear the sun are coming out of the shadows.

First up are the Nostropho.  Think all vampires are attractive?  Think again, these things are seriously ugly.  Hairless, dirt stained and with barely enough mind left to form their animalistic hives.  The first of the monsters to take advantage of the sunlight no longer being strong enough to burn them, these things are basically man sized locusts and are a seriously dangerous pest.  The first signs that a city has a building Nostropho infestation is when the homeless start disappearing.  Since the corporations have no interest in the homeless and jobless these early signs are often missed.  The next stage is when reports of attacks on the lower class habitations are reported.  Again the corporations often don't care as long as it does not mean that they have to fill the positions of a large proportion of the work force, but at this stage communities often start up bounties for every Nostropho head brought in.  If the corporations do decide to use some of their hirer guns to clear out the Nest then sometimes this merely forces the hive out into the open, where upon they go into a feeding frenzy.

This is what happened towards the start of the 2100s and it was then that the more refined monsters stepped out on to the stage.  The thirteen tribes of vampires cut a swath through the Nostropho and received a mixed reaction for their efforts.  However, by the time 2150 rolls round many have accepted the vampires as part of the new social order, after all the corporations are not interest in law and order, its too damn expensive, so the vampires have formed their own style of order enforcement.

Though the vampires are the major players on the world stage there are other creatures making an appearance, with werewolves showing up the vast tracks of Russia and demons showing up all over the world.  There are also the dhampyrs.  These half breeds are the result of a union between vampire and human and though rare because of the low birth rate, their numbers are also on the rise.  Bless and cursed with the strengths and weaknesses of both races, the dhampyrs inhabit an uneasy half way point between the two.

There are also the mutants that are showing up in the cursed earth beyond the city walls.  This is the industrial poisoned wasteland that is left behind after the corporations decide that an area no longer has anything of value.  Mother nature is always an opportunist and with take over any gap permitted.  There are even people here, those desperate enough to have a go at forming their own, hell on earth communities away from the eye of the corporations.  Life in the cursed earth is harsh, hard and often short but at least you don't have the corporations bleeding you dry.  Those that have the brains and the brawn to survive in the curse earth are a hardy people that don't suffer fools gladly.

There are also the naughty men and women who flit around the edges of society.  These are the smugglers and outlaws who ship in food when the job market in an area bottoms out, transport the 'bare-foot' doctors to the people who need them and in some cases, even clear out the Nostropho hives for the price of a restock and a damn good knees up afterwards, instead of taking every piece of coin a community has.  Though the corporations call them criminals, they are normally pretty safe from the vampires, the Undying Lords understand that while society has its 'Robin Hoods' it works.  Take those away, dam up the outlet for the masses anger and something will have to give.  Having survived through centuries of persecution, the vampires have no wish to be at the top of the house of cards when the bottom level falls to pieces.

New/Old Project

Right, I think that the project I'm thinking of is further enough along in production to be certain enough of publication to be worth announcing.

To further my market, broaden my horizons and hopefully produce something that people like enough to buy and simply because it was a good idea that caught my imagination and I wanted to run with it I have started writing an RPG setting.

For those of you who are not in the know, RPG means Role-Play Game i.e. those nerdy, dorky games where groups of people actually met up together at a games shop, sit round a table, talk to one another face to face, then have fun popping made up characters into an imaginary world and seeing just how well they cope when the powers that be (the Games Master and sometimes the other players) sling them a curved ball so curved that it looks more like a pretzel.

For those that like using their imaginations, social interaction and just sheer wacky fun, these games are a great investment of an evening out.  You can also let your id out of the box for a while so that when you go to work the following morning you do not struggle so much to not thump the manager in the face.  Just to show what I mean I once played a game with a lass who is normally as kind and compassionate as you could want at your side when you are having trouble.  However, her character in the game was a crazy inventor come mad scientist who we only keep in our team because having him work for the other side was a truly terrifying prospect.  Then to make matters absolutely worse he managed to father a kid who not only had accelerated growth (still not sure how that happened) but a mind that put Artemis Fowl to shame.  My character did her best to take the child in hand and only succeeded in teaching him the tools he needed to become a first rate little monster that started building his business the moment he meet the first desperado who was that hard up they didn't care that they were taking coin from a child.  By the time we finished playing that 'campaign' the little monster was rapidly racing for a fortune in business and property (I can't remember how the conversation about stocks and shares came up pre-game but the player immediately decided that it was exactly the sort of system her little monster would introduce to the world).  Personally I reckon the player was channelling all the things that annoyed her, angered her and simply horrified her about the current set of governments we've had and dealt with them by creating a character who could have bent governments to their knees if he'd decided to snap his fingers.

As a writer I have found these games are brilliant at practising the skills needed for character creation, situation control and they also help prevent writers block because in the game, when you have the rest of the group there, you can't over think the situation, otherwise someone else will jump in with an idea and sometimes those ideas are really, really bad.  You have to have the ability to see the situation, weigh up options and put forward your ideas, without insulting anyone else, and you only have a few moments to do so in.

Post school mental break down, when I had no self confidence to speak of, RPG gaming helped me re-find the belief that my opinions might actually have worth, that I could be accepted by a bunch of my peers and gave me a safe structure in which I could experiment with social interaction.  I swear I learnt more social skills at my RPG group than in eleven years at school.  And I had fun while I did it, even if some days it was the sort of fun of someone who is riding the dragon and is wondering when the dragon is going to realise that it has an unwelcome passenger.  I also meet my now husband through said group so I must have done something right.  I guess our soon to arrive baby has no chance of not being a geek.

Any way, 'Gloomlight' is at the stage where editing has started so I putting down a hopeful release date of 'late next year', in the hopes that it helps nail down some of the production timetable.  Here's hoping.

Newly Hitched

I don't normally share what I consider to be private stuff on my blog but this has been a big change and will probably lead to many disruptions in my work scheduled.  In fact, one of them is already on its way in the form of the infant distraction due in February next year.  I am now officially a Missus.

That's right, married on Monday to my new husband and I'm still getting used to wearing a ring all the time.  Thankfully I've worn gardening gloves when I'm working on the ground for a long time so I don't have to worry about it losing stones in the garden.

I am in the process of changing my name to match my husband but I will be keeping my maiden name on my products to avoid confusion at the publishers.  That must be the easiest way of gaining a pseudonym ever.

Granted, there are still days when the autistic me sits up and goes 'You did WHAT?'  And then has a panic attack over the fact that it was only a year ago that my husband and I were making it official that we were boyfriend and girlfriend.  I am trying my best to keep it calm and point out that he was courting me for eleven months prior to us making it official.  He has also been willing to take on the fact that I still do a lot of the caring for my mother, who is still coping with the fall out from her cancer treatment in 2013.  When they tell you that 'the treatment is going to damage your kidneys but we can fix that' you assume that they mean an operation, maybe two, to sort things out and then you are back to normal, rather like the gall bladder op that finally put pay to her liver problems back 2006.  You don't realise that they mean that you will have to have an operation every four months for the rest of your life to put stents in, the operation for which will damage your bladder and your throat because the tubes they put in you force the values to turn the wrong way.  Some days you have to wonder why you had the treatment done, or sat by and watched it be done.

Anyway, on to more cheerful stuff.  The day itself, although cloudy, was dry and we had a brilliant ceremony at the registry office.  There was nearly a last minute hitch when the best man was late but it all turned out fine and the ceremony itself went smoothly.  My sister catch the flowers, which I had folded myself out of paper (origami flowers for special occasions are an idea that I'm trying out).  That in itself was pretty appropriate as my sister should, all things going according to plan, in November next year so she'll be the next one in the family to marry.

We then had a lovely dinner at the Village Inn at Little Melton before coming home and chilling out for the rest of the day, followed by several days off, hence why I haven't done much work this week.  Official honeymoon is going to be over the first weekend in December, during which we are hoping to go away for a couple of days to have a total break from routine.  I know that sounds weird for a pair of Autistics but if you give us enough notice then Autistics can actually enjoy having breaks from routine and trying new things.  I've learnt to go 'right, I'm on holiday so no long term plans, we'll do today what gets done and then see about tomorrow.'  That way I'm not disappointed to the point of having an autistic moment if things don't go according to plan because it helps my head keep a more flexible attitude, at least more so than the government.

Selling Again!

Those that regularly follow my blog will know that some months back a friend of mine pointed out a serious error with the titles listed in the front of my book.

I am happy to announce that this error has now been corrected in both the hardback and softback versions of my book and they are both back on sale at Drivethrufiction.  Please visit my shop page to find out more and thank you for your patience while the links were down.

Creature Creation

Decided to do a cross over blog, as in one that counts as much for writing as it does for the art.

When creating creatures, there are a couple of factors that you have to keep in mind, the greatest being 'what is its place in the food chain'.  If your creature is meant to be the one at the bottom of the food chain then it isn't going to work if it struggles to reproduce.  The 'rodents' need lots of numbers to make up for the loses to predators.  Equally, if it is at the top of the food chain then what is the rival predator that helps keeps its numbers in check?  Nature never comes up with a design that is utterly unbeatable.  If there is a predator that has no natural enemies, other that it's own species, then you can almost guarantee that there will be a disease that culls out the numbers if it becomes too numerous.  You just have to look at the fungi in the Amazon rain forest that reproduce by infecting insects with their spores and taking over their nervous systems.  It sounds like something out of science fiction and it is disgusting but the more numerous the insect species the more likely it will be attack by its fungi predator.

You then need to consider that form follows function.  For instance, my artwork seriously started with a sketch to explore how the fantasy creatures dragons could actually evolve.

First off, is the major issue of flight.  That is the thing that sets dragons apart in many fantasy setting, the fact that they can fly.  They also have a habit of lairing in cold, damp caves, despite the fact that caves are nearly totally unsuitable for a reptile.  I put the two together and thought of hydrogen, the lightest of gases, the most flammable and the most readily available in the form of water, if you can crack it off the oxygen.  The cracking process would produce a lot of heat, hence the dragons need for a cool lair; you do not want to over heat a body that is stuffed full of hydrogen, the result is a very big bang.

So hydrogen would proved the lighter than air lift needed for flight, would drive the dragon's need for coolness and a ready supply of water and also provide its ability to breath fire, which possibly evolved as a safety valve.  Tubes from the gas bladders to the mouth, say opening under the tongue would pipe the hydrogen to where it could be safely mixed with oxygen, while a chemical gland along the lines of the bombardier beetle's would provide the spark needed to ignite the reaction.

Now for the illustrations out there, I have a little bug bear.  Most books described the dragon's wing a bat-like and then the illustrators draw them with the 'little finger' of the wing limb folding along the forearm.  That is physically impossible for a bat.  A bat's wings is jointed exactly the same as the human hand and the human hand cannot touch the little finger to the outer edge of the forearm.  Therefore, a dragon would more likely fold its wings by making fists and then pulling the 'arms' into the sides of its body.

As for how the dragon manages a six limb configuration I went with the idea that the spine extends beyond the arm shoulders into a second set of collar bones and shoulders to support the wings.  The muscles of these second, wing arms would over lap the chest and back muscles of the arms and be anchored in them so that the dragon's chest would to all intents and purposes be double muscled, which would give the driving power to the wing beat.

I also decided that the arms would be shorter than the legs so the dragon would ride over its hips like a bipedal dinosaur, rather than be four legged animal on land.  That would meet that the arms could support hands, much more useful for the grasping of prey and treasure, and the long tail would balance the weight of the body.  I also decided that a dragon would most likely have spines on the end of the tail that could lay flat in flight or be opened as both an air break and a weapon as the tail would be the most vulnerable area, as I've never understood why the legends say that a dragons belly is unarmoured when a lizard has equally tough scales all over.

Going for all round maximum efficiency I designed the back feet to sport the sickle claws of a velociraptor, only on a much bigger scale.  These would act like grappling hooks on cliff sides and a butchers hook when tackling prey of a similar or larger size than the dragon.  If the claw structure was of the same design as a cats i.e. built up in multiply layers, then the risk of loosing a claw tip would be of no moment as the dragon would just have to pull off the damaged layers to reveal a new, sharp point.

There you are, that's my thought processes behind my dragon illustrations.  If you are going to create fantasy creatures and 'monsters' in either your books or your art, my advice is 'the more outlandish they are, the more thought behind the function is needed'.  Granted with artwork you have a little more leeway but in writing it is definitely true that you need to be able to justify all the spines and extra limbs your creature has.  Have fun.

Eye Problems

What is the most annoying malaise that could possibly affect you in the modern First World.  Oh let's see (clue there) not being able to drive because of co-ordination difficulties?  Well that's one that affects me but normally I can work round it thanks to the invention of buses, or if I'm really desperate and have the money (not often) taxis.

Not being able to hold down a job because by the time I recovered from a post-school mental break down I was needed as a full time carer for my mother and now that we finally have people around us that can take that responsibility off my shoulders, I'm way past the age that anyone would consider giving me a first job?  Yeah up to my neck in that one but I'm trying to find a way around it by becoming self employed.

Coming home at the end of a day trying to convince people to buy my stuff and wanting to sink into the floor and never be seen again, while the Autistic child in my head screams at the top of her lungs, loud enough to block out all thought?  Yeah that one is a difficult one, especially as people don't see just how hard it is for me to stand there and do the whole 'talk to strangers' thing, when all the time, I have a little voice in the back of my head saying 'Mummy says 'never talk to strangers."  Yeah I know it sounds stupid but I am Autistic, we take to heart what we are told, especially if it is a boundary because part of us is desperate for a structure to make sense out of the world around us and another part, once we hit school age, hopes that if we obey all the boundaries then people will like us.  Why else put a boundary there unless to say 'all those on this side we like, all those on that side we don't'?  I can fully understand one Autistic man's story - he went mute after moving school because in his old school he talked and nobody liked him, in his new school he didn't talk the first day and everybody was nice to him.  Conclusion - if you don't talk people like you.  I can fully understand that and if I'd thought that it would have worked, I'd have done the same thing but in my schools if you didn't talk you had the piddle taken out of you for 'being a freak'.

However, beyond all of this I'd say the most annoying malaise has to be getting conjunctivitis nearly every time I take five minutes out of the jobs to play a computer game and have some fun.  It's not like I have that much time to have fun and soon I'll have even less so being bittern when I do manage to have some fun is not appreciated.  That and it means that I have to take it easy on other computer work for days afterwards so it even slows down my job and all.  Sigh.

Still the show must go on and the softback version of 'The Return of a Nagus' should be back on sale in the next week.  Check out the shop page for updates.

New Art, New Merchandise and File Updates

For those of you who are regular followers of my blog will know that for the last few months I have been working on a much bigger painting than I have attempted before.  The good news is that I have finished!

'Mulo's Son, Morrigan's Daughter', or 'Morrigan to give it its short name, is now up for sale and viewing at http://v-j-bartlett.deviantart.com/art/Morrigan-565634792

Having completed that very happy news I have now spent umpteen boring hours watching the loading wheel spinning round and around while I upload it to the various sites that I sell my artwork through (for full details please visit the 'Sales' page, which includes all of the relevant links).  My eyeballs now feel as if they have been dipped in sand.  This is why I'm still rocking the old paper and paint brush technique of artwork over the painting art programs you can buy for the computer, to long in front of a computer screen does my eyes no good what so ever.  I'm probably going to have conjunctivitis by tomorrow morning, not nice and always a worry for an artist and a writer.  You only get one pair of eyes and as of yet they haven't been able to work out a way of replacing them.

The only good thing about being utterly bored is that the wiglet seems to sense it and decides to brighten up my day by kicking.  At the moment it actually rather tickles, although I have no doubt that it will become more uncomfortable as he grows.  I've already been forced to put aside a fair number of my clothes as I no longer seem to be able to fit into them.  I guess the comfort is that this weight gain is only temporary, really only temporary and then when I loose it, i.e. the little on is born, I'm going to be too tired to worry about weight and or lack of it.  Oh the joys of motherhood, fashion is always the first casualty.

Oh and the updated version of 'The Return of a Nagus' (Hardback) is now up for sale.  This of course means that the softback version is being updated and therefore will be unavailable for a little while.  Please be patient and I will have it back on sale as soon as possible.  Once again a huge thank you to all my fans out there.

Social Strata

Decided that it was time to examine the social make up of 'The Return of a Nagus' so starting at the top...

The Emperor/Empress

This is a hereditary position but it has swooped between several races over the millennium as the direct blood line of on family has died out and a new era begins.  The main job of the Emperor/Empress is being the deciding vote in the Congress and keeping it from taking forever to debate an issue to death.  A combination of Speaker of the House of Commons and benign dictator, the Emperor/Empress' job wasn't so much give orders as guide the Congress into making the right decisions for the good of the people.  Herding cats maybe an easier task.

The Congress

Made up of the various ambassadors, ministers, dignities, envoys and diplomats that represent the planets of the Dynasty.  Often noisy, always divided into factions and habitually chaotic.  Alliances change by the day, sometimes by the hour.  Unless you are a native in double talk and scheming it is not a place to get a job, however it always seems to attract political hopefuls out to make their mark on Dynasty history.  The Congress Dome on Englansia is considered by some to be the centre of the Dynasty and is certainly the centre of the great debates.  Each planet has its representative so the Congress has grown in size over the centuries.
All of this was over turned when Morgan Chandler seized control of the Dynasty.  The Congress became a joke, where powerless diplomats debated issues only for their words to go unheard while Morgan and the Skilleths rules through brute force and abject fear.  During the time of 'The Return of a Nagus', many Congress seats remain unfilled as it is the only protest that the Planetary Governs can safely make.

The High Families

The ones with the money, the connections and the trade agreements of the Dynasty.  They can be as bad, if not worse, than the Congress as every member of the High Families are trained from birth to ever increase the value of the holdings of the Family Fortune.  The direct bloodline is also jealousy guard and there are strict rules for assassination attempts.  For most of their lives the Heads of the High Families are untouchable as the penalty for attempting to harm a Family Head or an Heir Apparent is death.  Actually killing one results in the offender being 'consigned to the void', in other words taken up in a shuttle and bounced out of the air lock.  The only time that this is not true is between the death of the 'Blood Originator' and their instalment as Head of the Family or their marriage.  To avoid the possibility of internal attempts on the Heir Apparent's  life, it was written into the laws that the holdings can only pace down the direct blood line, eldest to eldest.  If the Heir Apparent does perish then the Family ceases to exist as a High Family and the holdings must be passed on to a different Family.  As such normally the Rosinante are called in to act as body guards in this period as the Congress became tried of market contractions when an Heir Apparent was assassinated and the High Families started scrabbling to snap up the now free holdings.

The Guilds

With the High Families historically embroiled in scheming and back biting, controlling the stock market and the flow of finance, it was decided that having knowledge at the mercy of shifting alliances and always with the possibility of an essential piece of knowledge lost in an assassination attempt was not a good idea.  Therefore, the Guilds were formed with the idea that the High Families would handle the money while the Guilds protected knowledge and skill.  Though there is a measure of politics in the Guilds, to a greater or lesser degree, advancement is normally by examination and 'masterpieces'.  The exception to this is the Shardin.  Not quite a Guild but definitely not a High Family either, the Shardin are the information gatherers and processors of the Dynasty.  From the quite bar girl, keeping her ears open for the odd tip off of a drug dealer, to the Black Ops man hacking into the computer banks of a High Family, all are Shardin agents and ultimately answer to the Lord of the Guild.  Individual planets have their own information services but the Shardin answer to the Dynasty and to the Emperor/Empress.
After Morgan seized control of the Dynasty, many of the Guilds suffered division between those that supported Morgan and those that stayed loyal to Raquel.  No where was this more bloody than in the Shardin where being 'sanctioned' is a euphemism for being killed by order of a higher authority.  Office politics in the Shardin can be fairly fraught.

The Rosinante Templars

A semi-religious order, all members of the Rosinante are born with the Zi'kka abilities.  Set aside from normal people by these mental abilities, the Rosinante trained from childhood to control their power and always serve the greater good.  A Rosinante's first burden was always their duty, which was to do that which no others could, stand between the weak and those that would abuse them, guard the flock from the wolf and be the voice of reason in the face of hatred and persecution.  However, in the years preceding the Dark Wars, the Rosinante were more often involved in safe guarding the interests of the rich as they could not run any mission without permission from the Congress.  There is speculation that this may have had something to do with Morgan's fall to the Darkness.

Planetary Governors

 Responsible for the individual planets, the Planetary Governors are the heads of the 'local' governments.  Selection varies from world to world, with some being hereditary and others elected but all have to abide by the rule 'one governor, one planet'.

The Renegades

The flip side of the Rosinante, the Renegades are Zi'kka users that are followers of the Darkness.  They are the embodiment of selfishness and greed and are often found in the corridors of power; the Renegades normally use subversion and guile to take what they want from the Dynasty and as such are the most dangerous enemies of the Rosinante as they often appear to be upstanding citizens of the Dynasty.  Where there is a trade deal that puts profit before people, a building project that ignores the damage it is doing to the environment in favour of gain or cruelty performed in the name of sales, then there is the most likely place to find a Renegade.  However, a lot of the time it is just mortal greed and it is often difficult to tell whether there is a Renegade subverting people's better judgement or not.

The Free Companies

Those that are not exactly part of the power structure, if anything they are sort of the opposite to the power structure.  Smugglers, pirates, illegal slaving outfits are all counted as Free Company members but mercenaries also fall into this category as they are not controlled by any government directly, going where ever the money flows.

The Rest

Divided as ever along the lines of money, power and influence, with high class being comprised of those with money but not High Family status, middle class being the 'learned' workers such as doctors and solicitors, low class being manual labours, who most often inhabit the 'Termite Blocks' of the big cities and below all of them are the slaves, the indentured workers who can be bought and sold at the owners whim.  There are meant to be laws protecting the basic treatment of the slaves but the inspectors are often useless at their jobs or paid to 'look else where'.

So there you are, obviously the power structures shift and change as the books move as there are some big social upheavals in store for the characters.  However, if you want to write a 'realistic' novel you need to have these sorts of details organised while you write as it gives the text a depth that makes it feel as if the cities work, even when the readers aren't reading about them.  It also gives you an idea for what sort of characters you characters are going to be meeting and can lead to some interesting developments when they meet someone who doesn't conform to the usual power structures.

Einstein, Stretched Space and Faster Than Light Travel

Seeing that I haven't had a very go response from my more artwork based blog posts, I thought that I'd return to the world(s) of 'The Return of a Nagus' for this weeks blog post (sorry about them becoming a little irregular but an infant distraction really is distracting).

Whether you like it or whether you don't, if you are going to have science fiction whether other worlds are visited and other races encountered then you are going to have to have some form of space travel.

Now you could have it that its only just faster than light so most of the story takes place on the ship during the vogue, such as in 'Midshipman's Hope', which does have its merits as, if something goes wrong, you are a very long way from help but it does narrow down how many new worlds and new races you can meet with one lot of characters.

If you are going to have really faster than light travel then you need to put some thought behind it.

Some use an alternative reality that is theorised to lay behind our own.  This is very popular as you can introduce the risks of attracting the attentions of some THING that calls the 'Warp' home.  Usually these are of the demonic variety so it would be interesting to see a setting where the beings of the 'else where' are either not interested in humankind or are even angelic.

Some use Worm Holes, where time and space are folded like a piece of card and a hole punched through the desired point.

Having read 'Einstein and His Inflatable Universe' I came up with something slightly different from the usual system of Worm Holes.

Instead, I pictured the universe in the style of Einstein as a flat sheet with the gravity wells of the solar systems making depressions in said sheet.  Only instead of rubber, I imagined it to be made out of the material elastine, which is what those skin tight T-shirts are made out of.

Then if you want to travel from one solar system to another, you first fly out of the gravity well using the engines that are just short of faster than light then you select one of the threads, snap it and stretch it out before reacting it to the point where you want to go.  Because you have stretched the space you have also stretched the time, therefore a journey that normally only takes half an hour still only takes half an hour, its just that the end of the journey is in fact several million light years away from where it would normally be.

I have been told that it is one of the attractions of my books as it is pretty different from any thing else in science fiction.  If you'd like to read it for yourself and decide, please visit the shop page.  (The Hardback version maybe temporarily out of stock as I am updating the internal file as out the 24.09.2015 as someone pointed out a major blooper in the title listings.)

Of course, once you have worked out your faster than light travel you have to decide if there are any limitation on it.  It could be that only the biggest ships have faster than light travel so other than the rich and powerful, everyone else is reliant on being able to pay a big company for transport.

In my book I when for the idea that 'instant' jumps are impossible, you have to have a lapse of at least half an hour.  To add to the sense of historical development, I haven't specified why this is, just that the test ship "experienced severe technical difficulties".  This could mean that it had a total systems collapse or that the captains head imploded, I haven't really decided and I figured that it add to the sense that the technology has a long history of development if I left it unspecified.

Once that is all nailed down, you can start dreaming, where your faster than light travel will take you.  I'd say dream big, the universe is a big place, anything could be out there.

Patreon

O.K. having tried to create an Instagram account and failing because I do not own a smart phone and therefore cannot download the app necessary, I have taken the plunge and created a Patreon account.

For those of us who are not in the know, Patreon is a website that enables creators to upload their creations or images of there creations and in return their patrons pay them a small amount of money, be that per item or per month.

As my produce rate is fairly low and is likely to become even lower now that I have a baby on the way, I have decided that being paid per post is the most fair way of patroning me as there are likely to be some months where I do not have the chance to upload new content.

I have not stated what amount of money you have to pay to patron me as I believe that it should be up to the generosity of each patron, that and I didn't want to seem greedy.

As a patron reward, I will give to each of my patrons a signed and dated copy of Draconic Discussion:

My patreon address is https://www.patreon.com/user?u=2347372&u=2347372&ty=h

The image is attached to the post by the link and I hope that my work is good enough to patron.  Thank you every one of you who reads my blog posts.

An Infant Distraction

Am struggling to keep up with all the jobs recently, because I literally have an infant distraction in the making.  Quite literally.

Now that it's been confirmed that I'm four months along and everything is acting normally, I guess it is time to share the news - I have a mini minion on the way.

I'm going to be a mother.

Having gone from wondering if I was ever going to be brave enough to allow myself another boyfriend EVER to this stage in eighteen months is something that is I never thought would happen.

Now, having reached this stage I'm now wondering how the heck I'm meant to balance career with social life (not that I have much left, where is that blasted time turner!?!) and a little sproggling.

 I suppose it depends on how much the little one is like me and my soon to be husband.  Both of us started sleeping through the night at an early age and were quite content to amuse ourselves.  Of course that was part of the symptoms of being autistic so it will be interesting to see just autistic the next generation will be.  There again, I share a house with an invalid Mother, a to-be-husband, three mad-cap cats and two barmy-apeth dogs.  With all of that I suppose that I've had a lot of practise at making my life work, just, so adding an autistic baby to the mix... could be absolute chaos in the making.

Oh fun and games here we come!

Artwork, Myths and Legends

All right, I will admit that the reason that there hasn't been a blog post here for far too long is because last week was just plain weird.  One of those weeks were the routine was thrown out of the window at the beginning of the week and then didn't return for the next ten days.  O.K. technically the last week and a half has been weird but you understand what I'm trying to say (I hope).

I've only just about managed to regain routine from Wednesday onwards this week so I've had a fun time trying to catch up with all the work that wasn't done last week.  Still I'm just about climbing on top of it now (how come it looks as tall a Everest from the bottom and not so big from the top?) and I have another possible contract coming in but it is rather like a competition in that there are several artist looking to land the job and I need to send my pencil sketch to the judge to see if I land the spot.  Still I have a deadline of January next year but I'd rather get it done quick so that the judge can see that I'm committed to the project.

Sometime in life timing is everything.  You know the schools that stopped sports day because it 'wasn't fair on the losers', well I'm sorry to tell you kids but once you are out in the nasty world of work, everything is basically a race and you have to run harder and faster than everybody else on the track.  Whether we like it or not the word 'competition' rules the day.

Granted that is why I'm now self-employed as an artist and an authoress, because there was no way that I was ever going to be able to run fast enough to beat the others in the competition for a 'normal' job (curse you co-ordination difficulties).  However, just because I knew that I was going to fall flat on my face in that race didn't stop me racing.  Instead, I found a race where I had more of a chance of my strengths being able to carry me through rather than my weaknesses tripping me up.

So saying, the work on 'Mulo's Son, Morrigan's Daughter' is coming along well.  Granted today it took me nearly an hour to paint her boots.  What comes of having to work double hard at your co-ordination and need to make it exactly right so that the boots look like black leather but you can still see the shape of one leg in front of the other.  Heads up to those reading this, I work with traditional paint brush and paper and I do not intend to shift into digital media.  This is because I can neither afford to buy the sort of software needed to produce the sort of quality expected and also if I spend too many hours, too many days running staring at a computer screen I wind up with serious conjunctivitis.  I'm an artist, risking my eyes working with a media that puts an undue strain on them is just stupid.

Any way, to give you a heads up one what to expect from this painting, I'm branching out into studying the myths and legends of Europe.

The Mulo's Son comes from the Romany legends of the Mulo (Muli if it was female).  From what I have read I think these creatures are where we gained the legends of the Gothic vampires.  The original vampires of European legend were seriously ugly, think a befanged Lord Voldemort and you've just about got the picture.  The Mulo however were extremely handsome and seductive as that was how they hunted.  The Mulo fed, through shall we say, intimate contact with their prey (cough blush).  However, if the victim survived the draw on their life energy then they could produce a half breed child, blessed and cursed with the strengths and weaknesses of both races, one of those weakness being that they need extra life energy only, not being pure supernatural, they had to access it by drinking blood straight from the vein.  The flip side strength was that they were unearthly beautiful, like their supernatural parent.

The other reason I think that the Mulo/Muli were the ancestors of the Gothic vampires is because the original vampires couldn't change their shape, where as the Mulo/Muli could, the two favourite alter forms being a very large wolf or a truly gigantic bat.

Interesting enough Mulo/Muli children were considered to be the most dangerous of all the undead as the only way to kill a Mulo/Muli was to find its grave and pour a libation of hot oil over it to complete the burial rights.  Their half breed children, however, had no graves, therefore they could not be permanently killed.  You could dismember them, burn them to ash and given enough time they could regenerate.  Sprinkling the ash on running water used to speed up the process if anything as it gave the pieces something to move through.  Rather recalls the Hammer Horrors Dracula's ability to keep coming back for one more round.  That is the other thing, the greater majority of the Romany's settled in Ireland as it was the one European country where they weren't persecuted and Bram Stoker was Irish.  Um, possible link there, wish I knew how to do the research to find out more.

Any way, back to the painting, I decided to combined the two alternative forms into a werewolf like creature only with six limbs, two of which are huge wings.  Drawing the four arms with all the proper muscles in place was a decided challenge, even with an extremely good reference shot.  It was fine up to the point were I had to deviate from the original to extend the spine to take the extra limbs, that was interesting.

The other character in the painting is, of course, the Morrigan's Daughter.  The Morrigan was one of the Irish Celtic Goddesses of death.  She was also known as the 'Chooser of the Slain', something akin to a Valkyrie as her birds, crows would fly over the battlefield and chose who would die.  She could also take mortal lovers and is said to have born children for them.  Apparently nearly all of her children were daughters with daughters running strong in the following bloodlines.  However, these were not fair maidens suited for an ivory tower, these were warrior maids and shield maidens, more than capable of fighting alone side their friends in battle.  It took a very strong and very brave man to be able to court a daughter of Morrigan, hence why in the painting she is carrying a drawn rapier.

Her costume I picked up from a short story that featured a Morrigan Daughter as one of the main characters as it fitted the Gothic tone and I just plain well liked the description.  The only change I've made is that the cloak is only half length so that she didn't cover up all the details of the Mulo's Son behind her.  I also liked the description of the costume because it made it blatantly obvious that she was a desirable women who was not afraid of her body but didn't neither was it 'everything on show' like many pulp fantasy female outfits are.  I do not agree with the nudity of most fantasy artwork but I do appreciate a painting that shows a women as a strong equal to a man.

I decided that a Morrigan's Daughter would probably be the best 'beauty' to fit my 'beast' so I have painted them with complementary colour scheme that is the opposite of the back ground to make them stand out.  There is only a little more work on the Morrigan's Daughter to do so I'm hoping to have her done by the end of the month.  Once she's done I promise to put a post up here.

Artwork and the Lack of a Camera

After many months of struggling to make time for it, I have finally managed to return to my artwork and my current project 'Mulo's Son, Morrigan's Daughter'.  Having started it in January, it rather ground to a halt after I finished painting the back ground but still the start of this month I have been able to put the base colours on the Mulo's son and start layering up the fur texture.

Of course what hasn't helped with the sheer amount of time this one is taking is that I upgraded from A4 to A3.  That of course means twice as much paper to cover and paint to use.  However, there is a very good reason for this, besides a leaning towards being a glutton for punishment.  I was studying the Rodney Mathews art book 'In Search of Forever' and there is a particular picture of an alien style moose is an alpine forest where the snow is a beautiful smooth shade of lilac.  Rodney Matthews comment on it was "I have often been asked how I made the snow so smooth.  The answer is that I painted it on A1.  If you paint a picture on A4 and turn it into a poster, no matter how smooth you made the A4 painting, the brush strokes will show up on the poster.  Make it poster sized and shrink to A4 and it will look amazing."

Unfortunately, I have no businesses near me that can scan and JPEG anything larger than A3 so I've gone for as large as I can manage.  I am glad to say that all ready it is paying off as I'm able to include details that I would not have done on A4 so hopeful once I've finished it and scanned it, it will look superb on my merchandise.

It has been suggested to me that I paint on A1 and use a really, high powered Digital Camera to take the images.  There are two problems with this.  I do not know anyone with a high powered digital camera who would take the images for me and I do not own one myself.  Seeing that I need to order new stock in on my books soon as well as several top ups for my artwork merchandise I do not currently possess the money for anything like that so I have to stick with what I know works, hence why there is no 'in progress' photo with this blog post.

Hopefully I will have it finished soon and then everyone will be able to see it.

Slavery

Thought I'd do some blog posts about some of the themes I try and tackle in my books.  Now it might surprise some people that I made slavery such a central issue, considering that it is a science fiction novel.

Well, anyone who keeps an eye on the less explored corners of the news or should I say, the corners of the media where the real news is reported, knows that slavery is not an evil that disappeared with the Act of Abolishment.  It is still very much alive and killing.

I am not just talking about the Thailand fishing fleet who use 'indentured' workers , who aren't allowed to living the ships they work on for years at a time or the palm oil plantations in Indonesia where the workers are lured there by the promise of good pay, only to have their passports removed when they arrive.

There are also the girls, some as young as twelve who are trafficked from America, Russia and many other countries to work as women of the night.  So the next time you walk passed a curb crawler without sparing her a glance, it might be a good thing if you stop and have a wonder about where this woman of a hundred men came from and how she ended up turning tricks on her knees for dirty money.  Not all of them wanted to wind up where they are and some of them have no choice but to be there because they will most likely wind up beaten to death if they try and run from it.

Although I think the saddest story I ever read and I think it is the one that started my hatred of slavery has to be the one I read when I was in Middle School.  Unfortunately I cannot remember the title or the author, although I do remember the pictures in it and the fact that it was a true story from the 1990s.

It detailed the life of an Indian girl who was sold by her father to be a maid in a rich man's house but the head woman of the house decided that the new maid was too pretty so she sold her on to a sweat shop to stitch clothing.  However, the girl had, at some point in her childhood picked up the ability to read, so when they were given their merger pay, she spent it on a book instead of the sort of treats that the other girls buying to try and attract a husband.

When the shop owner saw her new book the owner said 'You can read?' to which the girl said 'Yes, ma'am.'  The shop owner, having ascertained that the girl could also count and had impeccable manners, put the girl to working on the shop floor to serve the customers, many of whom were very rich.

One day, one of their regular customers came in and when the girl had finished serving her, the girl realised that the lady had left her purse behind so the girl ran with it out of the shop to return it to its owner.  When she returned to the shop she was boxed round the ears for daring to leave the shop without permission.  However, the lady had followed her back and told the shop owner that if she didn't value an honest and compassionate worker then the lady would take her.

So the shop owner stuck out her hand and said 'I paid good money for this girl, I want it reimburse before I let her go' to which she received the reply 'Slavery is illegal in India, what were you doing paying money for her in the first place?'  As you can imagine, the shop owner was not having a good day.

As much as the story was a happy one because the young girl was rescued, it is also a horrid one because it starts with a father who is willing to sell his children.  As a grown up I can see where the young girl was very, very lucky.  She could have been sold to a brothel at which point she'd never have had the chance to get away.  She could have been sold to a family who didn't have a woman at its head who was still strong enough to sell off the pretty maid when she started wondering about her husbands behaviour.  How many of these child maids are also mistresses, I wonder.  The young lass in the story managed to avoid so many of the worst aspects of slavery but the truth is that she shouldn't have been there in the first place.

Now you could ask what sort of father would sell his daughter.  The answer - a poor and desperate one who couldn't wait for her dowry money to make ends meet.

Can you imagine being a parent that desperate that you have to choose between which children to keep and which to sell so that there will be enough food on the table to feed those that are left?  Can you imagine being that poor that you have a choose between either giving your children up or watching them starve?

When you stop and think of it, doesn't that make poverty a form of slavery?

That is why I made slavery such a central theme in my book.  It still exists, it is still a threat to the vulnerable and those that can't fight back.  I was also asking the question what would happen if someone started rallying those that are knelt in chains and convinced them that they had the right to fight back.  What would happen if they picked up their tools and used them to bash open the heads of those that oppressed them?  Would it stop there or would it keep running, would all at that misery and fear reach a flash point and turn to an anger that cannot be stopped until it has run its course?  And could you blame them if it did?

Could you blame those that have been beaten and broken, kicked and cursed when they rose up and struck back?  Could you blame them when it spilt over on to those not involved?

I cannot, for it is also the fault of those not directly involved in holding the lash because we do nothing to stop it.  We let our business poison a countries water with mercury and then we buy their products while we mouth on about how terrible it is.  We say that child slavery is wrong and then we sit by while supermarkets pay the families that produce our food next to nothing so they children are bullied at school for being poor and wearing second hand clothes.  We refuse to let a council build wind turbines in 'our backyard' so someone else's child has their lungs clogged with the soot from a coal powered electricity station.

Part of me wonders who is the more evil, the ones that hold the lash and admit to what they are or the ones that don't hold the lash and won't admit to their culpability?

Banking on a Barclays

Right, I know that this will come as a surprise to many of you because I did not advertise this one but yesterday, Tuesday the 28th , I held a pop up stall at the Barclays in Dereham.

If you are a small business and your local Barclays is part of this scheme I really do advice you to get in on it.  My local Barclays provided a table free of charge and opposite the glass front door so people could see me the moment that they walked in.  All I had to provide was my stock and a chair to sit on.

It went fairly well.  I managed to sell two of my books and five postcards in total.  The two books went in the morning with the postcards following in a steady-ish trickle.  Had a period between 12 and 2 when things went pretty much dead but I've come to expect that.  What made hanging on in that period was that I was having to sit there and consider routes to the nearest lady's room on account of a sicky feeling stomach.  I've been having nothing but trouble recently with indigestion and it is really beginning to get me down as I have enough problems finding food I can eat with my list of food alleges without having my stomach decide it's going to rebel at the slightest thing.

Still it was a good day, with over twenty pounds collected, though most of that is expense money, especially as I have now dropped my prices.  Still it is a fair lump to the account and will hopefully mean that I will soon be able to start stocking different merchandise, which hopefully in turn lead to better sales.  I have to hold up my hand though and admit that ,as of yet, I have not started producing the hand made cards.  I know that it will probably be my greatest earner but I am still looking for that time turner (if anybody knows where I can collect one please let me know).  I have come to realise that there are only twenty four hours in the day and I have to spend eight of them asleep to be up to producing anything.  Sigh!

I think one of the most wonderful and frustrating parts of the day was when a businessman (who else would be dressed in a very sharp suit and carrying a brief case) enquired about my products and we talked over my inspirations.  Having enquired about one of my bigger prints and the price of it framed (£7-£9) he went to withdraw the cash for it, only for the machine to tell him he had to go on the Internet for some reason.  However, instead of buying nothing he bought a couple of postcards so I didn't go home empty handed.  Curses you computers for denying my a bigger sale!

Any way, for those of you interested the softback version of my book is on sale at

http://www.drivethrufiction.com/product/144687/The-Return-of-a-Nagus?src=hottest_filtered

Over Price? Under Price? Definitely Over Working

Report on the St Nicholas Church Craft Fair.

Not good.  Not good at all.

The first day I managed to sell three postcards and that was it.  After one o'clock it just died, we had no new people come in through the doors after that point.  The only good thing was that I was able to use the time to work on some manga fan art that I have been meaning to work on for ages.  The manga and anime shop in Norwich on Westlegate has a board on which local fans can display fan art, through which you can be contacted about a commission if you leave your details.

In that respect, I'd say the Japanese are much more sensible about fanfiction and fan art than we are.  Apparently in Japan you can make and sell fan art as long as you do not make more than something like £1500 a year at it.  It seems to me that the Japanese recognise that fanfiction and fan art only happens when your fans love your work that much, that simply consuming it is not enough, they actually have to engage with the world they love.

Second day did not look to be much better.  I managed to sell two postcards and then I didn't sell a thing for four hours!  Oh, I had people aplenty wishing me 'best of luck' but not giving me any luck because they refused to buy anything.  I was very close to putting my head down on the table and sobbing at more than one point.

As it is, one lady saved my day and probably the state of my mental health.  She asked me, 'Do you have any paintings of anything local'.  I replied, 'well that one is of Swanton Morley church'.  To which she said, 'really?' so I said, 'yes, that's pretty much the view I have out of my back garden early in the morning'.  To which she replied, 'O.K. I'll have half a dozen'.  To say I very nearly gaped at her is putting it mildly.  Thankfully I retained my wits and counted out the postcards.

However, even with that wonderful, wonderful lady I still only sold eleven postcards and one T-shirt so I am recalculating all of my prices.  I know the advise is that people value more expensive stuff more and think that its worth more but at the moment I can't get them to buy pretty much anything.  Therefore I am dropping my prices of what I sell in person with only the books remaining at the same price.  I apologise to anyone who cannot come to my events and therefore have to buy my stuff over the Internet, if Internet buying is more expensive.  I cannot afford the monthly payments necessary to have the Premium packages and therefore the websites set the prices.

I am also drawing up a 'sales' poster as that apparently brings people in.  It means cutting my profit and therefore my wage, to an absolute minimum but if it gets the sales then ultimately I might actually make more than I am currently.

I also have yet more work to do, on top of rehashing all my prices and therefore posters.  The only lady that made any real money there was the lady to my left who makes handmade cards, all of them individual and sells them for £1 each.  Having watched her do a brisk trade all weekend, I've decided that I might as well try it.  Now I just need some card, some pencils, some little envelopes and some time.

What is this weird thing called free time?  I'd like to meet it some time.

Girls with Autism

No I haven't suddenly become clairvoyant, the TV program of the same name is still on at 10.40pm on ITV tonight but the article I read about it did make me stop and think.

As much as I appreciate the fact that Autism is no longer the elephant in the room, seen, heard but unmentioned, I still feel that it is being misrepresented.

I agree that the autistics that have amazing abilities need to be celebrated so people can see that this condition can be a good thing and the autistics who are struggling beyond belief also need their turn in the limelight so people can understand just how hard this condition can hit a family.  I agree with it all but people seem to be gravitating towards believing that you have to be either an autistic savant or a hopeless 'window licker'.

This just isn't the way it is.  There are those of us who are walking geniuses and there are those of us who are going to need constant care from birth to death but the greater majority of us are some where in the middle.

The problem for those of us who fall in the middle is that we learn to hide what we are, we learn to blend in, we learn to walk the walk and talk the talk of 'normal' folks.  We learn to walk like you, talk like you and all the time we are screaming inside.

I have pushed myself like never before to publicise my book, going to craft fair after convention after fund raiser.  I have paid my door fees, smiled the smile, talked to everyone who has come near my stall and managed to sell some of my books and my artwork.  And I'm coming home after each one more and more exhausted.

Just last weekend I was at ExiliCon in Cambridge and it was a very gone convention as far as I was concerned. There was a fair number of people without there being hordes, I sold a fair amount of stuff and was told that my postcards are bargains.  The train journey there and back was smooth with no hitches and the gap between platform and train was manageable without a ridiculous step up (the Birmingham train stations could take notes).  All in all a good day.  And I was shattered by the time we made it home.  All I really wanted to do was crawl into a corner some where and blub until I'd cried a pond.

But I couldn't.  Why?  Because of my training.

Sitting in a corner and blubbing until you have cried a pond when you have had a good day is not normal and therefore is not done.  Even though I know that it would make me feel better, I can't over-ride the conditioning to 'act normal'.

There are times when I have a raging case of the jealousies at Down Syndrome people.  They seem to go through this life oblivious to their differences, accepting the hand that was dealt them without fuss and not questioning why people don't treat them the same way that they treat other people.  I can't.  I know that there is something that I'm not thinking, not doing, not saying that makes me different from everyone around my and that it makes me an outsider to society.

I know that I am 'wrong'.  I don't know how I'm wrong, I don't know why I'm wrong in your eyes, all I know is that some how I am.

To borrow a quote from the great J.K. Rowling:

"It's not so much anything he's done, it's more the fact that he exists."

She could have written that about any Autistic that has made it through state schooling.  We try and hide, we try and run but we can never avoid those that would rather we didn't exist.

So the next time you see an Autistic writer, an Autistic artist or an Autistic inventory trying to sell their stuff at a fair or convention, just remember that though we are smiling and chatting and showing off our wears, inside we are a mess of nerves and tension and conflicting instincts all buried beneath the mask of 'acting normal'.  We may act normal and you may think 'you don't look autistic at all' but remember, just because we act normal doesn't mean that we are cured, we have just learnt to hide what we are.

Why do we have to hide what we are to get by when people with missing limbs don't?

Preview Chapter For Sale

Hello everybody!

Have just published a preview chapter at

http://www.drivethrufiction.com/product/152643/The-Return-of-a-Nagus-Preview-Chapter?manufacturers_id=7428

This is a 'pay what you want' PDF of the first chapter so if you want to pay nothing you can pay nothing and still get to read the first chapter and see what you think of my story.

Least ways, that is what one of the founding members of Drivethrufiction suggested to me when I met him at the UK Games Expo and I've only just got round to acting upon it. Curse the pile of jobs that is mounting up around my ears, as to add even more to the pile my editor has informed me that I need to add another chapter to the second book.  Having face, momentarily, hideous prospect of have to spend days sculpting a whole new chapter from the raw clay of the suggestions she has given me, I bottled out and decided to get this smaller job done first.

If I'd realised how easy it was actually going to be I would have done it ages back.  The only reason I haven't done it earlier was because I expected it to take ages to do.

Of course, I do hope that you thoroughly enjoy it and come back for your copy of the full book but even if you don't, please send me a review either at either thevatwork@outlook.com or on my face book page https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100008627804752

Here's to happy readers. 

Art Galleries And Extra Work

O.K. a new Art Gallery opened on one of the main streets of Dereham recently and as I was in Dereham yesterday I thought that I would pop in and have a look see.

Oh my word, there is stuff in there that is absolutely amazing!  Although I'm finally reaching the stage where I can look at artwork like that and not immediately think 'there's no way I'm going to make it in this career', which is a relief.

However, when I enquired about renting a section of the wall, as the Gallery advertises, I suffered a set back.  Apparently it has to be 'Original' artwork not (despite the fact that I spotted at least ten pieces up on the wall that said that 'Print' on the label beside them) and they also have to be Bespoke Framed.

Excuse me, but where do you suppose a new, just starting artist who is not getting regular commissions is going to find the money to bespoke frame their artwork?  The last time I saw a framing service they were charging £20 for an A4 to be framed.  So to get all 12 of my completed originals framed that would be a bill of £240.  I don't have that in the business account, at all!

What don't people get?  I'm a new artist, I have to display my work so that people will buy it and then I will receive money.  However, it appears that I must have money to display my work so I'm running as fast as I can, only to stay stuck in exactly the same spot.  Am I the only one who thinks that this isn't right, isn't fair and isn't justice?

I am trying to create myself a job in a country and a world that doesn't have any jobs going at the moment for Asperger Autistic me and for this I am penalised because I didn't have the strength left by the time I finished the AS levels not to have a mental break down, wasn't born to rich parents and don't have a sugar daddy willing to marry me.

The only way around the whole Bespoke Framing thing is if I going out and buy some canvases and paint them up with some original artwork, because the canvases mounted on the walls weren't framed.  I know that is output of money but it will probably be a lot less than Bespoke Framing would be and I do produce another load of original artwork.  Now I just have to try and find the time in which to do this extra work.  (Groans, buries her face in her hands and wishes to go back to bed before she starts sobbing.)

It's an artists life.

Fair Photos

Right, after far too long I have finally plugged my camera into my computer and downloaded all of the photos I've been taking since May of my various stall at the fairs, rallies and the one convention I've been to.

First up, the display from Diceni May 2015.

My first ever fair and it went very well, with six books selling and a fair amount of interest in my stuff.  I thoroughly enjoyed the day, ever if my feet hurt like billie-o that evening.  The only down side was that the jigsaw of Dragonic Discussion was a display piece rather than a actual saleable piece as it had come without a box.  Note to producers of merchandise, if you advertise as being able to do jigsaws, people expect them to come in a box.

Next was the Eastern German Shepherd Rescue Fund Raiser.

This one was, to not put too finer point on it, an unmitigated disaster.  I paid £15 for a pitch that spent most of the day being rained on.  I only managed to sell four things all day, not nearly enough to pay back the pitch fee.  In short it was not fun.

However, it was made up for by the UK Games Expo in Birmingham.

Despite being horribly long days on my feet and an totally exhausting/terrifying trip there (they obviously don't make train stations with people who are manoeuvring very large/extremely heavy luggage in mind) it was a lot of fun and I did take home a fair sales report.  Granted 90% of the money made was expenses but it was still a good top up for my business' account.

I also learn a few thing while I was there, including a better lay out for my stall.

The Friday wasn't the best sale day and when it crept towards an hour and half into the sale time on Saturday I was beginning to panic as I still hadn't made a sale.  More out of frustration than with any clear idea in mind, I reshuffled my stock and the sales started coming in.  Note to self, customers apparently prefer columns instead of rows.

The most recent was the Swanton Morley Tractor and Bygone Rally.

The first day was made a lot more relaxed by a bigger table, lent by a friend, and our good friend Pat who decided to come along and stay with me as my boyfriend couldn't be there.  However, the tables umbrella did not help when the rain decided to pour out of the sky so we had a very interesting time packing up.

This was dealt with on the second day when a load of our family and friends clubbed together to buy us a gazebo.

It was immediately used as it decided to pour it down for half an hour.  After that the sun came out so it provided us with some much needed shade.  However, the rain clouds didn't seem to leave people's hearts and they continued to have short arms and deep pockets all day.  Struggling to make a sale on a sunny day is tiring and a little depressing.  You expect to struggle to make the sales on a rainy day but on a sunny day it just gets to you.

Oh one last thing, my self modified top hat.

I had to modify it on account of three people telling me that I looked like an undertaker.  Going on the principle of the tale I had to do something.

For those of you who don't know the principle of the tale is this:

The first time someone says, "You have a tale,"  you laugh it off.  The second time someone says, "You have a tale," you begin to wonder.  The third time someone says, "You have a tale," you look over your shoulder to double check.

Tractor and Bygone Rally

O.K. here's the report on the Tractor and Bygone Rally last weekend.

I'm paying for it.

That's the simplest way of summing up the whole thing.  Not only did I fail to make back the pitch fee which is always a serious disappointment but I haven't been truly without pain since.  My left leg particularly is not giving me any rest, quite literately.  I'm waking up several times every morning with my left hip cramping up and to say that it is making me more than a little tired is putting mildly.

This is the joy of living with Asperger Autism and having to try as hard as I can to sell stuff to become self employed.  Standing around for six to eight hours a day HURTS but if I don't stand around for six to eight hours a day I'm going to have no chance of selling anything.  This is the awful situation that my condition puts me in and the way that there are rumblings in the corridors of power, it is not going to get any easier for me.

However, on a good note, I managed to sell three more copies of my book, so that is three more readers out there, which in turn will hopefully feed into three more buyers in future years as my editor and I are working as hard as we can to polish up the second one.  We managed to hammer down another dozen pages of the second chapter just yesterday so this chapter is going a lot faster than the first one did.  I am hoping that if I can keep up the pace then I may be able to complete the second one before the original deadline set for next year.

If I can get it done sooner I maybe able to publish early.  Any body looking for an extra Christmas present?  I'm half joking as I doubt that I will be able to make that deadline but at the same time I can dream that I make that deadline.

In other news, work on 'Gloomlight', the RPG sci-fi gothic setting that I mentioned in my last post, has begun.  The setting description was just beginning to flow from my pen when I realised that if I was going to have thirteen tribes of things that creep in the dark (O.K technique fourteen but one of them is so bestial that even the 'ugly faces' of the other thirteen don't recognise them as anything save monsters) then I need to start a list so that I could straighten out names, general geological location, basic history and attitudes to humans and the other tribes.  That is the greatest part of being an author, making sure that all your continuity is in a straight line.  If its not then, I'm afraid, you are a bad writer.

I have also managed to unearth my most recent painting and a moment of luck struck.  We had a friend over who has offered to remodel the garden at a cut back price and when he saw me working on it he said 'I'd love to have that bit as a tattoo'. Hence, why I spent most of today tracing and re-sketching 'that bit' to make a tattoo design.

I have to admit that I'm not keen on tattoos myself, however, it is a market that I haven't explored and I'm wondering how one breaks into being a tattoo designer. Anybody have any ideas?